“The behavior of ‘madek’ is not only laziness, but also cunning” [LIST]

We present the entire letter below

Today I read the article “Two-year-old girl cried for 15 minutes on the train. If you have children, don’t travel” [LIST]”Because the contents of this letter are terribly biased, I have decided to write my reply to it and give a different perspective on the issue of children in public transport vehicles – because the problem with children is not just on trains, but sometimes also in coaches and even public transport.

To begin with, I would like to point out that I am aware that caring for a child is not an easy task. I am single, but I take care of my cousin more than once and do my duty as an uncle. It is not an easy task, and at the same time I am aware that parents of children have it even more difficult, and more than full time.

Once a person gets older, he stays older forever. Contrary to appearances, we singles also have friends and colleagues – both private and work – who are already parents and sometimes talk to them about the rigors of parenthood. Sometimes for entertainment, sometimes for conversation, and sometimes we are curious about what lies ahead when we can finally start our own family.

The aforementioned letter describes numerous inconveniences that parents face while traveling with their children on the train and when despite their best efforts they have a problem to calm them down. I admit – I sincerely sympathize with such parents and believe that they should not encounter such reactions from their fellow passengers.

However, this letter shows a problem that didn’t come out of nowhere and I think unfortunately these parents are the exception.

I still remember a trip from Warsaw Central to Wrocław Główny. Departing sometime after 11pm, a man loaded himself into the compartment, tired after all day. All you think about then is the desire to rest and sleep during the journey, which then lasted more than six hours.

However, I couldn’t sleep for a moment because I was sharing the compartment with a child who cried all the time. His mother – slim, tall blond – didn’t care and didn’t try to calm the baby at all. So the baby cried for over half an hour until he finally got tired and fell asleep.

Nice, comfortable solution for the mother who does not have to do anything, but for the other passengers it was a compulsion to accept the behavior of the child that the mother should have prepared for the journey and learn the basic principle: the train is not just for her and the child, and there are other people who want to get to their destination in peace† Like it or not, the child is not a pet or a toy – in the decision he decided to take on a lot of responsibility – this includes raising him to behave well between people.

This is not the only case, although I suspect it is one of the most common. It is not without reason that in the world, especially on the Internet, there is a dominant division of mothers into mothers who take care of their children and in “crazy women” who do not lift a finger, but expect to treat them and their children with the highest honor as if they deserved everything just to bear their children† I’m sorry to blame anyone, but respect for people works both ways and you can’t always acknowledge everything with the phrase “because it’s a little kid”.

Another case that I remember from personal experience is a train journey from Katowice to Warsaw. I was lucky enough to find an empty compartment. However, it soon became apparent that right behind the wall there was a mother with a 6-year-old boy. I have nothing to say that for example he walked around the train and looked in other compartments – I behaved the same at his age, only at that time it was difficult to find another job on the train than to read something or quietly to sit.

Now there are many options for a mom to keep her kids entertained – reading, watching cartoons, movies, or even buying a portable game console and headphones. It’s not really difficult – it’s just a matter of goodwill towards fellow passengers, but also for the child, so that they do not die of boredom during the trip.

But what did this boy think of me? When he got bored with the train depot, he found something to do – lie on the seats and kick the wall of the compartment with his boots. Right between me and them. The boy’s mother? No response, then she caught him verbally one time and the boy ignored her and kept kicking.

The behavior of “crazy women” is not only idiotic and demanding, but also cunning. There are many stories on TikTok of people who met “madeks” while traveling by plane. The scenario is usually the same: the main characters pay a lot of money when buying a plane ticket to reserve a window seat.

The motives are different – some just like it, others de-stress, while they are afraid to fly … reasons can be multiplied. Then they board the plane and it turns out that they have to fight for this place with a “crazy” who, by making her child sit by the window, unashamedly tries to annex the paid seat rather by someone else. Why do other people have to pay for extra travel activities for my child? Unfortunately, “crazy women” do not propose to reimburse the costs to the owner of the place, but they start quarrels to force their victory in the discussion.

Negative stories can be multiplied and multiplied. Another hit for me was my parents cycling with their kids on a bike path worth mentioning – a narrow path. Instead of giving goosebumps, to give people from the opposite direction the opportunity to quietly pass by, they drove in one row, across the width. I then attracted attention, as I had nearly collided with one of the children – instead of apologizing, I was just verbally abused and told to guard my nose.

I believe that instead of following a one-sided story and condemning everyone around for mistrust and dislike of parents with children, you should try to look at the subject from different perspectives.

The truth is that not only people who travel without children can take lessons here in good manners and with respect for others.

We singles are no worse. We also work or get tired in other ways, and we also want rest. We also use public transport, bike paths – or other things, and we want to be able to use them with the feeling that we are respected too. Feeling that singles who work and pay taxes, eg for 500+ and other benefits, are not people of a worse category. Not everyone is one of their own choice.

Meanwhile, the ‘madki’ with their antics blur the differences between the mother and the ‘crazy’ in the eyes of society – resulting in the behavior described in the letter I just commented on. I see it on my face and the effect is – I admit it without hitting – the fact that if I were on the train from the first letter, I would probably act like a businessman and say that you are not with children must travel . I believe that if the children do not know how to behave and their parents are not able to take care of them, then it is apparently too early for them to go into the public world with their children.

If you want to share your opinion with us, write: redakcja_lifestyle@lst.onet.pl

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